Monday, June 30, 2008

I have a pleasant looking face meaning: the impression I give based on how I look is that of a pure, kindhearted, non-grudge holding, quiet and friendly person... well I can leave out the friendly part because a lot of times I give the "back off" or "don't approach me" attitude.
My grandmother calls me "nesma" lol except lately she says nesme we feeha 3asefa every now and then.
Based on how I look noone can ever guess the dark thoughts that can sometimes envelop my being. Nobody can guess how mean I can sometimes be. Nobody can guess the saracastic/mean comments that are always in my head, they're never uttered though. Maybe that's why. It's so easy being deceived and I'm a great indication of that. Because they can't see it with their eyes, they automatically assume it doesn't exist. It's like that with everything.
I hate it when someone says I'm pure or kind because eventhough I'm empathetic by nature, eventhogh I feel good when I help out a friend or someone in need. I AM NOT THAT PURE.

So many layers of anger, rage, sadness and resentment are buried so deep inside of me underneath perfectly numb skin.
One day it will all come out.
it's gonna be ugly.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

it's like you're talking about me :) (calm peaceful angelic smile)

silent observer said...

hehehe :)
there's something I don't get, why do you comment as bluevoid on my blog and as evaluna on others?

Anonymous said...

loool, I hate it when it happens, but see... cause my address is bluevoid.wordpress.com so when commenting in blogger (in the open ID space thingy) I can't change it into Evaluna, when commenting 3andy or 3and any other blogspot blog.. if they have the (name/url) option I get to choose to type Evaluna!
confusing huh! lol

and the reason my address is bluvoid and NOT evaluna is cause evaluna was not available, and i like blue void! humff... hope ennak tekoony msh etlakhbaty awy :D